Updated: Aug 27
Growing up was not all good for me. Despite that fact, I always had an attitude that everything will be alright. I prayed when I was feeling overwhelmed with emotions and kept my mind on future plans. I guess the ideal of getting away helped me cope with the issues that surrounded me. I thought I had a handle on past issues from my childhood. I thought once I was out of my situation, I did not have to worry about dealing with any hurts. It is kind of like when you have a bad relationship and you break up with that person. When you break up with that person, you do not have to deal with them anymore. (unless you have some type of tie to that person) Well, I thought that was how it would work out. I thought I would not have to deal with that those issues anymore. I read an article that said people cope in different ways. Koelzer stated that after a trauma, people generally cope in a number of predictable ways:
Acting out – using substances, addictive habits, and risky behaviors;
Rationalizing – minimizing the impact of the situation;
Staying busy – by distracting ourselves, we won’t have to deal with it;
Repeating the behavior – often abuse is handed down generation to generation. (1)
Personally, I stayed busy and acted out a little bit. When I was in my 20's, everything came to a head. Everything I covered up ,came to the surface at one time. I was caught off guard. I did not know how to deal with it. I became depressed. The only thing that kept me afloat, was God! You may think that I am just saying that, but it is true. I taught Sunday School and I had to study to teach Sunday School. So, yes, God kept me afloat. Before reading the article that I talked about from above, I analyzed why I was feeling depressed. I did exactly what Koelzer said to do! He said, "Identifying underlying core issues requires a straightforward technique which can be mastered. It is as simple as taking a current emotional reaction and riding it back in time to the first time you remember feeling that way. What was going on? Who was there? Where do you feel it in your body? At The Clearing, identifying underlying core issues is the first step toward issue resolution." (1) I knew the reasons for my depression. I knew because this happened, that is why that happened. It is Cause and Effect. I knew I had to do a Deep Dive within myself to solve the issues that I was currently having. I did not want to stay in a miserable state of being. I knew that a Deep Dive was necessary to being a better person!
1.https://www.theclearingnw.com/blog/heal-underlying-core-issues Joe Koelzer Healing Underlying Core Issues: Key to Lasting Recovery